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MIND THE GAP

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Copyright © 2003, Julie Plenty Personal and Business Coach http://www.kick-start-your-self-esteem.com

- QUOTE -

"Happiness is neither virtue nor pleasure not this thing or that but simply growth. We are happy when we are growing" - W. B. Yeats

MIND THE GAP As a Personal and Business Coach I am a strong advocate of goal setting and becoming clear about what you want out of life.

As you work towards your goals, there is sometimes a sense of feeling frustrated by the gap between where you are now and where you want to be.

One way to change this is to change your thinking and assess how far you've come and what you've actually achieved, rather than focusing on what you haven't - so far.

- UNIDENTIFIED ACHIEVEMENTS - A friend of mine was applying for jobs and wondered whether she was good enough, experienced enough to get them, or at least an interview.

In fact she was over qualified for the jobs she was applying for. She had done and covered so much more than her job description, she had skills and experience in: project management, accounting, budgeting, marketing, staff management and development. However, she had difficulty in recognizing her skills and achievements, which was reflected in the type of posts she was applying for.

I've done this myself. After travelling around the world, people commented on what a brave thing it was to do - especially as I went on my own. Truth is, I didn't find it as difficult as I thought it would be and downplayed my achievement. It is only relatively recently that I begun to acknowledge what a big achievement it was for me.

Sometimes when we find things that come to us too easily, it's all too easy to believe that they don't count as an achievement, that somehow we have to struggle to attain something that is worthwhile.

There are other times when societal beliefs prevent us from seeing our achievements and skills as well.

Parents (and especially mothers) who have taken time out from paid work to raise their families often lack confidence when it comes to going back into the workplace. But running a household is like running a small business: budgeting, time management, negotiation skills, coaching etc all come into play. These are skills which have been developed from running a household - and should be highlighted if going back to work. I bet employers don't always think of it that way!

COMPARISONS ARE ODIOUS A potential obstacle to be aware of when assessing your hidden skills are making comparisons. If you focus on what someone else has or what they've done, it's rarely in your favour. In fact what it does is ensure that you feel that you are lacking in some way.

The funny thing is, the object of your envy may also feel as if they're lacking too!

- WHAT YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT - - Focus on what HAS been achieved, rather than what hasn't.

For instance this week I really didn't feel like going to the gym and felt a little out of sorts. In the end I went and did half of my workout. For me the achievement was getting to the gym at all, rather than the fact that I "only" did half of my normal workout routine.

- Learn how to recognize, acknowledge and value your hidden achievements - become an achievement detective!

Once you truly recognize and acknowledge how far you've come, you'll become a whole lot clearer about where you're going and feel better about it too!

Until next time.....................................

Warm regards

Julie Plenty

Julie Plenty is a Personal and Business Coach who helps people with goal setting and motivation, work/life balance improving creativity and Life Design Strategies. Subscribe to her newsletter "Only Connect" with tips, tools, information and resources for your personal, professional and business success. Subscribe by visiting: http://www.kick-start-your-self-esteem.com

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